


Needed

by B_oys_do_c_ry



Category: Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (Cartoon 2018), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Angst and Feels, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Platonic Cuddling, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 10:28:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29009061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/B_oys_do_c_ry/pseuds/B_oys_do_c_ry
Relationships: Leo/Reader, Leonardo (TMNT)/Reader
Kudos: 14





	Needed

Tonight was the night where the guys, including April, came over to your place to hang out. The entire afternoon was filled with snacks, Jupiter Jim marathons, small arguments here and there, the occasional times where Raph would dare himself to fit something in his mouth and you all had to beg him to stop, and even more snacks.

Despite you going on and on to your uncle about how you could take care of the apartment yourself for one night, the thought of the turtles leaving your company unsettled you. So as the day drew nearer to an end you insisted that they should stay for the night; it’s not like they had anything else to do for the rest of the evening.

Happily giving into your begging request, the boys instantly made way to help you prepare a pillow den in the living room for you all camp out in. The process didn’t take long with the help of an ape-sized turtle that was able to carry a bunch more plush items than any of the rest of you could together.

You managed to fish out some comfortable clothing to lend to April seeing as she couldn’t strip down and relax in just her shorts like the guys. Although, Leo wouldn’t quit begging for something warm of yours to borrow.

The excuses ranging from: “Sleeping in your living room is like locking myself in a meat freezer!” To, “Trust me, if I had nipples right now, they’d totally be erect.” Let’s just say he walked out of your room a happy turtle, draped in a black hoody that surpassed his thighs. He was lucky that you bought all your clothing 2x your size.

Only a couple of moments passed by the time you guys got yourself settled, nestling together in a huddle on the now cushioned floor, apart from April who lounged on the sofa. Mikey took the responsibility of setting up a movie that you’d all soon drift off to. He laid on his plastron with his chin in his hands, gawking directly at the TV after hitting start at the play menu.

The kid fell asleep 10 minutes into the movie. As did the others, one by one, leaving you tossing and turning as you struggled to join in with their slumber.

You would take a peek every now and then at everybody that was sleeping in the heap of quilts, clearly that no matter how many times you checked, they were all still asleep. Even Donnie, which was surprising to the eye of anyone that knew the turtle well enough, as he was classified as the “Nocturnal” one of the brothers. Keeping himself fuelled with caffeine to have the opportunity to work in peace as the others slept was his nightly routine. Maybe today he didn’t have his regular dosage.

Your next attempt at trying to doze off was also a complete bust, leaving you to roll onto your back with a quiet huff. Although your shuffling was stifled by the soft echo of snores and churrs filling the room. Your gaze remained fixed on the ceiling, noting every minuscule crack you could find. The street lights of New York dimly gleaming through your windows aiding you.

Your body had already flung itself up and into action at the sudden grumble that erupted from your belly. It’s not like you were going to nod off anytime soon, so a little leftover ice cream wouldn’t hurt, right?

With slow movements, you cautiously tiptoed passed where Mikey lay, stretching across to put the TV on standby. You were gonna go insane if you had to listen to the same repetitive music from the now finished movie once more. Changing course, you made way to the kitchen, careful not to trip over any green feet along the way.

The kitchen wasn’t far from where the turtles slept, the doorway only a few steps away. You could make out the hill of body that was Raph - curled into himself with a pillow clutched comfortingly close to his chest - in front of the sofa. April was sprawled out with her arm draped over the big guy and her hair messily caught on her face. Seeing her without her glasses on is something you’ll never get used to.

Leon settled on his carapace, his arms folded beneath his head with the hoodie sleeves rolled up to his elbows. For someone who was “so cold”, he sure as hell didn’t mind having his legs out in the open.

Donnie had acquainted himself beside Mikey, leant on his side with his hands tucked between his cheek and the pillow. Seeing Donnie so content was just…so not Donnie. Although his red and blue goggles still remained on his crown which wasn’t really a shocker.

You rubbed at the corners of your eyes, the light that emitted from the now open fridge making your sight hazy, struggling to keep focus. You swiped at the ice cream tub as soon as you caught a glimpse of it.

However, you undermined your level of strength (or how much ice cream you had already eaten prior) and thus ended up dropping the almost empty tub on the tiled floor from your sudden movement. The clatter made you jolt simultaneously and mutter a quick “shit!”, which came out more like a quiet yelp.

You scurried to the ground to retrieve the ice cream, all while your head swivelled from left to right, on high alert in case the noise had woken any of your friends. Seeming as though the coast was clear by the continued snoring heard from the other room, you heaved yourself back to your feet with a relieved sigh and turned to close the fridge door.

The flick of a light switch seemed to have scared you more than anything.

“Hey there, stranger.” The boy in blue stood at the kitchen’s entrance, his hand still rested on the light switch. Under the blinding light, you could make out the loose smirk he held as he stared at you with a half-lidded gaze.

You kept your mouth agape momentarily as you collected yourself from the scare. Leo was always one for dramatics. “Jesus, man. Could’ve given me a better warning.”

“Like you were any more subtle.” The turtle raised his brows at you before moving to sit on the countertop nearest to where you stood. His husky voice was laced with a hint of sarcasm.

You quietly groaned, leaning back on the frosty refrigerator. “I didn’t wake you did I?”

“Nah, I haven’t had a wink,” Leo reassured then gestured to the item you were cradling. “You mind if I have some?”

“Knock yourself out.”

He fetched out a couple of spoons from the cutlery draw that happened to be in arms reach. Leo had become accustomed to your kitchen as well as the rest of your house after the number of nights he’s spent at your place. Felt almost like a second home to him at this point.

You popped off the plastic lid while also being handed a spoon for yourself, offering Leo the first scoop before diving in.

“So, what’s your deal? Can’t sleep or do you hang out in your kitchen at 4 in the morning as a pass time?” Somehow, even with his gob full, he was still able to poke fun at you in some way.

You rolled your eyes before preparing yourself for another scoop. “Can’t. Like, I am tired but my body’s just like ‘ha, think again’. Now here I am, eating morning ice cream with you.”

Leo gave you a once-over. “That sucks.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say it’s too bad. I prefer your company over my own.” A small 'pfft’ was heard in response. “What, you don’t think I like hanging out with you? I don’t just share my leftovers with anyone.”

You gave a lop-sided grin before grasping the fact that you weren’t amusing him. In fact, he didn’t even seem fazed. His regard was fixed on the spoon he was twiddling with.

“So, uh… When did your insomnia start acting up again?” You made sure to tread lightly, placing your spoon in the tub.

Leo gave a low grumble that even you could feel in your own chest. “Mmn, around Tuesday.” It was Friday.

“Have you told the others?”

“Didn’t wanna bother them…Didn’t wanna bother you.” His shoulders were slumped forward enough to lean his elbows on his thighs, suddenly interested in some dirt embedded in his nail.

Nibbling on your lower lip, you peered over at your friend, worry rising in the pit of your stomach. You were struggling with how to go about this without making him feel like he has to tell you what’s up. It’s not like you’re _not_ aware he’s not okay, but maybe this is one of those times he isn’t up for addressing it.

As softly as you could, you took a hold of his chilly hand and gently ushered for him to get off of the counter. His eyes shifted to yours quickly in question before coming to the realisation you were leading him to your room. He let his arm fall loose as you pulled him along.

You let Leo get himself settled on your bed before closing the door behind you. He seated himself relatively close to the centre of your bed, with his legs tightly crossed and the sleeves of your hoody now pulled down and bunched in his fists. His gaze was downcast, mulling over what to say and how to say it. Leo was great at reading other’s emotions, but when it came to his own, he was left for nought.

Leo peered over at where you stood, awkwardly leaning on the closed door. He felt bad for putting this on you tonight when you were already struggling to sleep as well as him, even though he hadn’t said anything yet. You just always knew there was something up with him when he wasn’t even sure himself.

“Come sit down. I don’t bite, man.” The turtle offered but was internally begging. He was so desperate for the mood to not get too serious. Please joke back, please.

A smirk slid its way to your features, “What an honour. _Leonardo_ , inviting me to sit on my _own_ bed? I couldn’t thank you enough, honestly.”

Leo patted the soft mattress lightly with a twitch of a grin. “Best seat in the house.”

You scooched your way over to him, the sight is not so graceful, but he didn’t care. You soon stopped, sat comfortably in front of Leo as you mirrored his posture. You were hesitant to hold his gaze, as he kept faltering. Though you decided to play with the hem of your hoodie, picking at any loose threads. This way you at least had his attention in some sense.

“Do you, um…” Leo focused on his wording as you twiddled with the material wrapped around his hand. “Y-you sure you like being around me? Like, seriously?”

Anxiety bubbled in his belly, awaiting your reaction.

“Leo…” He scanned the details in your face, recognition dawning over you and it was clear. He didn’t want you to know he wasn’t 'all there’, but he needed you to. He needed someone to. “I’m here to listen to whatever you have to say. You can trust me with anything. Look, I won’t even talk, I’ll just let you ramble on for days. As long as it helps you in some way.”

Cute.

Sadness clouded his features, his jaw clenched as he struggled to string together any words without an audible sob releasing. His eyes stung so bad.

_Are you seriously going to cry in front of Y/N?_

“I-I just feel like I’m good for nothing, y'know?” Leo’s voice came out more brittle than anything, as sorrow clung to his breath like the cold.

His eyes never met yours. Instead, he was picking out every crack and scar that was engraved into your hand as it laid in his lap. His train of thought was ramming its way through and there was no way to stop the flood gates from opening.

“It’s like the only thing I know to do is fuck up. I fuck _everything_ up. And the one time I _don’t_ , they don’t even notice. Like they don’t expect anything else from me other than being a total screw up.”

He was struggling to keep his voice lowered. It was still 4:30 in the morning. But with every word he’s ever had to confess bouncing right off of his tongue, it was hard to deny the temptations of just screaming until his throat would rip.

“For fuck’s sake- I just wanna be _noticed_. Like Mikey! H-he has his art, right? They love his art so much and so do I. They have something to be proud of him for because he’s able to actually do something. Donnie is the smartest fucking guy around, they can count on him for anything! Raph’s our older brother and he’s probably the softest guy on earth, and he’s our _leader_. People appreciate what he does because we depend on him! Why can’t _I_ have any of that?” His last sentence came out as a squeak as he choked back a sob, but ended up coming out as more of a splutter of words. “Creativity? Intelligence? Strength? The only thing I can do is make people think I’m a useless piece of _shit_.”

You watched as his body crumbled in front of you. He lost the grip on his sleeves as his chest began to heave, choked cries erupting from his throat. His eyes were clamped shut with hot tears spilling from their corners, trailing along the blazing red marks that graced his cheeks.

“Nobody trusts me with _anything_!” Leo took in a big sniff as his nasal ways began to clog. Everything was coming out now and he couldn’t stop it. “Why? Why does nobody need me?”

He pressed the palms of his rough hands to his eyes, rubbing harsh and deep, to the point where his vision swirled with stars. His lip quivered with every exhausted breath.

“I just wanna be needed.”

The only sounds that filled the air were Leo’s attempts to fight back the rest of the tears that threatened to fall. His sniffs and coughs from how raw his throat had gotten echoed throughout your bedroom.

Though the act was sudden, Leo was too dissociated to retaliate. He felt his hands being carefully pulled away from his face, now surrounded by the warmth of your own. You brushed over his knuckles a couple of times with the pad of your thumbs. Circling around each one with repetitive strokes.

Although with his vision blurred, he was able to make out how your eyes were fixed on him. He felt you staring at everything except for his own eyes. Like you were picking out of all of his insecurities at once. Leo shifted under your gaze, feeling more pathetic than anything.

The boy shivered as your hands snaked around his shoulders and to the back of his head. His brows furrowed sceptically before he felt his mask unfasten and fall from its regular position around his eyes. The tear-soaked material was now in your hand, while your other came up to caress the red under his eyes.

Your palm cupped his cheek and he couldn’t hold back the sigh as he nestled into your touch. You were always so warm, it was almost irresistible to not seek comfort in your heat.

“Y'know, you never cease to amaze me.”

Leo’s sore eyes enlarged at the delicate words that poured from your mouth so easily. He remained speechless as you examined every part of him. From his head to his cheeks, snout, mouth and jaw. Your expression as soft as the hand that held his face.

“You’ve always been there for every one of your brothers. When Raph’s scared and struggling to keep the team from falling apart, you help him pull through with the best motivational speeches of all time. Seriously, I don’t know how you come up with those so easily. You must’ve rehearsed or something in your spare time.”

You smiled sweetly as a low chuckle came from the boy in blue, the funniest of grins pulling at his lips as he lowered his head.

With a gentle pull, you brought Leo with you to the head of your bed, sat up against the pillows. Leo took your open arms as an invitation to slide himself close beside you, wrapping an arm around your middle with his head tucked beneath your chin. With both of your legs sprawled out, he had a leg overlapping yours, absentmindedly giving your foot a stroke with his own.

“Donnie can always count on you to be supportive of his work.” You continued, “No matter what, he always appreciates your input, whether he’ll actually take into consideration or not. You’re his twin brother, if anything, he feels he can trust your opinion the most.”

You cradled the boys head to your chest, leaning down to press your cheek to his scaly crown. Making sure your mouth was close enough so that your words were only loud enough for only him to hear.

“No matter what, you always try your best to keep a smile on Mikey’s face. Whenever he isn’t the one being a ball of sunshine, you always manage to bring that smile right back to him. It’s the sweetest thing. I’m pretty sure that’s your talent.”

Leo spoke into your shirt, his words being barely audible. “What, never leaving people alone?”

“Never giving up on the ones you love. You have so much love to give, Leo. You’re always there to pick us up when we’re down, and you constantly have a way of making us feel like we can just _be_. As if it’s enough.” You breathed in deeply, trying to keep your own composure. “We appreciate you _so_ much. We wouldn’t be anywhere without you and that’s a fact.”

You could feel your shirt slowly begin to soak as your friend burrowed further into your embrace, indicating they were Leo’s tears. That was enough to get you going, sucking in your quivering lip. Though that didn’t stop the ball lodging itself deeper in your throat as you spoke.

“Leo, you are _so_ loved and you are _so needed_. There is never a moment where we don’t need you, and there never will be. Your brothers, your dad, April, and _me_. We’ll always need you, and we’ll always love you for who _you_ are. Please don’t ever forget that. _Please_ …”

Leo hadn’t even acknowledged that you were crying until he felt you raise a hand to roughly rub at your face. He hooked his hand around your shoulder in an attempt to pull you closer, despite the weight he already had on top of you.

“Why you cryin’, loser.” There he is.

With a roll of your eyes, you let out a sorry excuse for a laugh. “Pfft, you wish.”

…

You both had spent a good five minutes calming yourselves down, with constant fidgeting to wipe at your faces and sniffling galore. Neither of you seemed to have any energy left to do just about anything, so neither of you moved from your position on the bed.

Before Leo had appeared to be asleep, you let out a shaky sigh. “I love you so much, man. We all do.”

“I love you too, Y/N.”


End file.
